"Mainstream"

It is not a matter of how to explain (That is a challenge in its self).  It is a matter of what to explain and when.
I have been trying to find ways to communicate with people. How to explain myself while trying simply to relate with others. As Jennifer Spears explained, "It's not as cool on the outside. The "hip" factor is stripped".

I am glad I have been going through this season of being stripped. I am glad in all of it to know that I am forgiven for these mental tangents of longings and self proclaimed images. I am seriously not cool. In fact I could be considered a world class nerd with the new style I'm rockin' these days, but the truth is I've mentioned me in a lot of this... It has nothing to do with me. The main truth being that I can't force Jesus Culture on anyone else. They have to want it. I wont repeat myself but reread the opening paragraph again... Go ahead, seriously.

How quickly I forget.

I have been wondering specifically; How do I make myself more mainstream? How do I take myself to a different level but not loose me in the madness?... Maybe it's not madness but it's this place where suddenly I feel stripped. Where suddenly life is reintroduced and things are all the more uncomfortable.

The truth is I don't know how to explain where I've been for the last month. I could speak until I'm hoarse. If I'm honest in asking (and I don't want to assume) What is it you really want to hear?

Many things aside I do not want to shut down. But I am finding it very hard to speak up. I am holding these things close to my heart. Why shelter these experiences? Why keep them for myself for the time being?...Well, I know that not all things fall to deaf ears... But I'm still learning to lean.


Timing is everything friends.

Merry Christmas.

Unpacking.

Under attack or just the Holy Spirity aching within me? Changing me. Molding me yet again this season.

^{Psalm 27:14
14} Wait for the LORD;
   be strong and take heart
   and wait for the LORD.

COURAGE. This has been our theme for the last 3 weeks and I have realized that I barely have any.

Who am I, Where am I?...South Africa. As we drove home. We drove home... This have only been our home for 5 days. and it is home. Just like the hostel we stayed at before and will be soon again too. Home makes me think of high school, Freshmen year and how I refused to call Green Holly rd home. Because of all the history that lead to it. I thought home was a place you built with memories. Home was something that grew with age and time. Now, however, I can see that it is quite the opposite. Home is what makes you and how, why.

Home is where you learn so much in the midst of these very short periods.

Home teaches you how to do things. Like to love quickly, to love deeply. To take those things that you learned and take them to the next check point to unpack in your bones and carry with you. We become walking antique shops skimming through memories with stories and with memories that are there with no recolection of how they got there.

Home is in each face, each word, each experience.

God is home, and He's making a ruckus...

Be encouraged, be strong and be patient.

Wait for the Lord.