Things I have noticed as of late:
-Rain is beautiful.
-Quality time is key.
-Sleeping while it rains is delicate and sweet.
-Old places become newer all the time.
-Gods words speak louder truth than any of us ever could.
-Honest is better than excuse.
-Running in the rain is freeing.
-Prayer travels faster than text messages or internet.
-Unplugging from technology and plugging into creation is good for everything.
-Gods timing in all things is best.
-"I really love you" swells the heart even more than, "I love you".
-Being blunt is good.
-So is grieving.
-Body aches and soreness is one of the best feelings.
-Seasons like these are simply stunning.
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Thursday, January 12, 2012
If you want me to.
Ecclesiastes 3
A Time for Everything
1 There is a time for everything,and a season for every activity under the heavens: 2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
9 What do workers gain from their toil? 10 I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race. 11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet[a] no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end. 12 I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. 13 That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. 14 I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that people will fear him.
15 Whatever is has already been,
and what will be has been before;
and God will call the past to account.[b]
16 And I saw something else under the sun:
In the place of judgment—wickedness was there,
in the place of justice—wickedness was there.
17 I said to myself,
“God will bring into judgment
both the righteous and the wicked,
for there will be a time for every activity,
a time to judge every deed.”
18 I also said to myself, “As for humans, God tests them so that they may see that they are like the animals. 19 Surely the fate of human beings is like that of the animals; the same fate awaits them both: As one dies, so dies the other. All have the same breath[c]; humans have no advantage over animals. Everything is meaningless. 20 All go to the same place; all come from dust, and to dust all return. 21 Who knows if the human spirit rises upward and if the spirit of the animal goes down into the earth?”
22 So I saw that there is nothing better for a person than to enjoy their work, because that is their lot. For who can bring them to see what will happen after them?
Keep reading...
Tonight I began to understand more- Better. This fire, this calling is not something we learn. It is something that God builds within our DNA. It is what has been planned from the very beginning. It is clear to see that our futures are unclear to us. But to our incredible Father, it is crystal clear.
It may not be the way we choose but God, you never said it would be easy. Whoa am I thankful and filled with such things I can't create words while feeling your grace and love tonight.
As I lay my head down tonight I pray for the children... Your children. That you would protect those who have met you and those who have yet to. I thank you for these scars that you lay upon us, to remind us. I pray that I could even feel a mere splinter of what you feel.
Bending... Breaking...Mending
Praise God.
Monday, January 2, 2012
Thoughts bubbling like a 3rd grade Science project
My mind is reeling upon why the Lord does what He does. I feel like at times He awakens us from night terrors. Rocking our R.E.M. Cycles of comfort and repetition. Pulling the covers off our bodies to feel the weather of reality around us. Which then makes me think...
How can I fix this for myself? How do I make myself more comfortable? But (really) how can I tell others to put on a jacket? To take care of themselves? Or better yet, let the Lord take care of them?
Micah 2:6-13
6 “Do not prophesy,” their prophets say.
“Do not prophesy about these things;
disgrace will not overtake us.”
7 You descendants of Jacob, should it be said,
“Does the LORD become[a] impatient?
Does he do such things?”
“Do not my words do good
to the one whose ways are upright?
8 Lately my people have risen up
like an enemy.
You strip off the rich robe
from those who pass by without a care,
like men returning from battle.
9 You drive the women of my people
from their pleasant homes.
You take away my blessing
from their children forever.
10 Get up, go away!
For this is not your resting place,
because it is defiled,
it is ruined, beyond all remedy.
11 If a liar and deceiver comes and says,
‘I will prophesy for you plenty of wine and beer,’
that would be just the prophet for this people!
I will surely bring together the remnant of Israel.
I will bring them together like sheep in a pen,
like a flock in its pasture;
the place will throng with people.
13 The One who breaks open the way will go up before them;
they will break through the gate and go out.
Their King will pass through before them,
the LORD at their head.”
For serious now. These aren't things to be ignored. Not something to wake up lightly enough to throw your leg out of the comforter to become apart of the club.
God's been shaking me awake lately. Making me see what things have been eating away at my everything while equally causing saw dust to cover up what is true. What must I do to sweep up this place? This place meaning my views and perspectives. My patience and my heart. How do I unclog such places so that they openly flow again?
I'm sorry if none of that makes sense. If it does make sense, do you feel me and do you agree?
...What a chain reaction that comes from two simple words,
"Follow me".
How can I fix this for myself? How do I make myself more comfortable? But (really) how can I tell others to put on a jacket? To take care of themselves? Or better yet, let the Lord take care of them?
Micah 2:6-13
6 “Do not prophesy,” their prophets say.
“Do not prophesy about these things;
disgrace will not overtake us.”
7 You descendants of Jacob, should it be said,
“Does the LORD become[a] impatient?
Does he do such things?”
“Do not my words do good
to the one whose ways are upright?
8 Lately my people have risen up
like an enemy.
You strip off the rich robe
from those who pass by without a care,
like men returning from battle.
9 You drive the women of my people
from their pleasant homes.
You take away my blessing
from their children forever.
10 Get up, go away!
For this is not your resting place,
because it is defiled,
it is ruined, beyond all remedy.
11 If a liar and deceiver comes and says,
‘I will prophesy for you plenty of wine and beer,’
that would be just the prophet for this people!
Deliverance Promised
12 “I will surely gather all of you, Jacob;I will surely bring together the remnant of Israel.
I will bring them together like sheep in a pen,
like a flock in its pasture;
the place will throng with people.
13 The One who breaks open the way will go up before them;
they will break through the gate and go out.
Their King will pass through before them,
the LORD at their head.”
For serious now. These aren't things to be ignored. Not something to wake up lightly enough to throw your leg out of the comforter to become apart of the club.
God's been shaking me awake lately. Making me see what things have been eating away at my everything while equally causing saw dust to cover up what is true. What must I do to sweep up this place? This place meaning my views and perspectives. My patience and my heart. How do I unclog such places so that they openly flow again?
I'm sorry if none of that makes sense. If it does make sense, do you feel me and do you agree?
...What a chain reaction that comes from two simple words,
"Follow me".
Sunday, December 25, 2011
"Mainstream"
It is not a matter of how to explain (That is a challenge in its self). It is a matter of what to explain and when.
I have been trying to find ways to communicate with people. How to explain myself while trying simply to relate with others. As Jennifer Spears explained, "It's not as cool on the outside. The "hip" factor is stripped".
I am glad I have been going through this season of being stripped. I am glad in all of it to know that I am forgiven for these mental tangents of longings and self proclaimed images. I am seriously not cool. In fact I could be considered a world class nerd with the new style I'm rockin' these days, but the truth is I've mentioned me in a lot of this... It has nothing to do with me. The main truth being that I can't force Jesus Culture on anyone else. They have to want it. I wont repeat myself but reread the opening paragraph again... Go ahead, seriously.
How quickly I forget.
I have been wondering specifically; How do I make myself more mainstream? How do I take myself to a different level but not loose me in the madness?... Maybe it's not madness but it's this place where suddenly I feel stripped. Where suddenly life is reintroduced and things are all the more uncomfortable.
The truth is I don't know how to explain where I've been for the last month. I could speak until I'm hoarse. If I'm honest in asking (and I don't want to assume) What is it you really want to hear?
Many things aside I do not want to shut down. But I am finding it very hard to speak up. I am holding these things close to my heart. Why shelter these experiences? Why keep them for myself for the time being?...Well, I know that not all things fall to deaf ears... But I'm still learning to lean.
Timing is everything friends.
Merry Christmas.
I have been trying to find ways to communicate with people. How to explain myself while trying simply to relate with others. As Jennifer Spears explained, "It's not as cool on the outside. The "hip" factor is stripped".
I am glad I have been going through this season of being stripped. I am glad in all of it to know that I am forgiven for these mental tangents of longings and self proclaimed images. I am seriously not cool. In fact I could be considered a world class nerd with the new style I'm rockin' these days, but the truth is I've mentioned me in a lot of this... It has nothing to do with me. The main truth being that I can't force Jesus Culture on anyone else. They have to want it. I wont repeat myself but reread the opening paragraph again... Go ahead, seriously.
How quickly I forget.
I have been wondering specifically; How do I make myself more mainstream? How do I take myself to a different level but not loose me in the madness?... Maybe it's not madness but it's this place where suddenly I feel stripped. Where suddenly life is reintroduced and things are all the more uncomfortable.
The truth is I don't know how to explain where I've been for the last month. I could speak until I'm hoarse. If I'm honest in asking (and I don't want to assume) What is it you really want to hear?
Many things aside I do not want to shut down. But I am finding it very hard to speak up. I am holding these things close to my heart. Why shelter these experiences? Why keep them for myself for the time being?...Well, I know that not all things fall to deaf ears... But I'm still learning to lean.
Timing is everything friends.
Merry Christmas.
Monday, December 5, 2011
Unpacking.
Under attack or just the Holy Spirity aching within me? Changing me. Molding me yet again this season.
Psalm 27:14
14 Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.
COURAGE. This has been our theme for the last 3 weeks and I have realized that I barely have any.
Who am I, Where am I?...South Africa. As we drove home. We drove home... This have only been our home for 5 days. and it is home. Just like the hostel we stayed at before and will be soon again too. Home makes me think of high school, Freshmen year and how I refused to call Green Holly rd home. Because of all the history that lead to it. I thought home was a place you built with memories. Home was something that grew with age and time. Now, however, I can see that it is quite the opposite. Home is what makes you and how, why.
Home is where you learn so much in the midst of these very short periods.
Home teaches you how to do things. Like to love quickly, to love deeply. To take those things that you learned and take them to the next check point to unpack in your bones and carry with you. We become walking antique shops skimming through memories with stories and with memories that are there with no recolection of how they got there.
Home is in each face, each word, each experience.
God is home, and He's making a ruckus...
Be encouraged, be strong and be patient.
Wait for the Lord.
Psalm 27:14
14 Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.
COURAGE. This has been our theme for the last 3 weeks and I have realized that I barely have any.
Who am I, Where am I?...South Africa. As we drove home. We drove home... This have only been our home for 5 days. and it is home. Just like the hostel we stayed at before and will be soon again too. Home makes me think of high school, Freshmen year and how I refused to call Green Holly rd home. Because of all the history that lead to it. I thought home was a place you built with memories. Home was something that grew with age and time. Now, however, I can see that it is quite the opposite. Home is what makes you and how, why.
Home is where you learn so much in the midst of these very short periods.
Home teaches you how to do things. Like to love quickly, to love deeply. To take those things that you learned and take them to the next check point to unpack in your bones and carry with you. We become walking antique shops skimming through memories with stories and with memories that are there with no recolection of how they got there.
Home is in each face, each word, each experience.
God is home, and He's making a ruckus...
Be encouraged, be strong and be patient.
Wait for the Lord.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Majestic is Your Name
Sleep seems like such a waste of time when there is so much that still needs to be done before I depart.
To Do lists out the wazoo and people I still want to talk to! And yet...I can barely keep my eyes open.
I am beside myself with how blessed I have felt leading up to this trip and where the last year has taken me. There is no doubt in my mind...This is Gods awing work. Gives me chicken skin (goose bumps) every time. One thing I know for sure through all these uncertainties and plans that are sure to change as each hour dissolves is this, God knows my heart through and through. He knows how I am built and He has created my heart to be a certain way. Unlike anyone elses and that is so NEAT! But He knows me inside and out and He knows what I need. It has been Places, Travels, Experiences, Trials, Joys, Love, Friends, Family, Mentors, Silence, and Seasons.
Matthew 10:29-30
Where ever I have gone, God has provided communities and encouragement and I am so, SO grateful for these stunning seasons.
To Do lists out the wazoo and people I still want to talk to! And yet...I can barely keep my eyes open.
I am beside myself with how blessed I have felt leading up to this trip and where the last year has taken me. There is no doubt in my mind...This is Gods awing work. Gives me chicken skin (goose bumps) every time. One thing I know for sure through all these uncertainties and plans that are sure to change as each hour dissolves is this, God knows my heart through and through. He knows how I am built and He has created my heart to be a certain way. Unlike anyone elses and that is so NEAT! But He knows me inside and out and He knows what I need. It has been Places, Travels, Experiences, Trials, Joys, Love, Friends, Family, Mentors, Silence, and Seasons.
Matthew 10:29-30
Where ever I have gone, God has provided communities and encouragement and I am so, SO grateful for these stunning seasons.
Friday, November 11, 2011
Wake Up.
Last night it hit me. Last night while I was in a tube of a shower on the second floor in the quietest house I've ever felt.
I'm going to South Africa.
People have been asking me what my thoughts are on leaving for a month, what my reactions will be, what I look forward to doing or becoming while I am there. People ask me how my heart could possibly handle the heart ache that I am about to encounter... "Are you ready"? At times I feel like they are asking me to predict the future. The truth is I have a soft heart (something I have been told the world needs more of) and I know it is meant to be broken. However that is not what I am looking to. My answer is usually the excitement in thoughts of being able to love every little face I encounter. To be able to talk to that specific little one whom God put on my path or God put me on theirs to discover presence and His love encountered. And it is a very true hope. A hope that He can use me the best way He knows how.
There is something important that I have left out though.
You ask me how I feel. You ask me if I'm alright and if I will be able to handle these things in which are upon me. You may ask these things with a darker stand point on the subject. I would like to be a reminder that God's been there the entire time. We are headed there to amplify. We are headed there to celebrate and love. We are headed there to encourage and be encouraged.
Last night it hit me square in the face. What are my hopes? Amidst these worrisome nerves what are my ambitions for not only this journey but the road that I currently walk down with my own two feet?
I want to thrive not just survive.
Psalm 46:
1 God is our refuge and strength,
always ready to help in times of trouble.
2 So we will not fear when earthquakes come
and the mountains crumble into the sea.
3 Let the oceans roar and foam.
Let the mountains tremble as the waters surge!
Interlude
4 A river brings joy to the city of our God,
the sacred home of the Most High.
5 God dwells in that city; it cannot be destroyed.
From the very break of day, God will protect it.
6 The nations are in chaos,
and their kingdoms crumble!
God’s voice thunders,
and the earth melts!
7 The Lord of Heaven’s Armies is here among us;
the God of Israel is our fortress.
Interlude
8 Come, see the glorious works of the Lord:
See how he brings destruction upon the world.
9 He causes wars to end throughout the earth.
He breaks the bow and snaps the spear;
he burns the shields with fire.
10 “Be still, and know that I am God!
I will be honored by every nation.
I will be honored throughout the world.”
11 The Lord of Heaven’s Armies is here among us;
the God of Israel is our fortress.
Interlude
I'm going to South Africa.
People have been asking me what my thoughts are on leaving for a month, what my reactions will be, what I look forward to doing or becoming while I am there. People ask me how my heart could possibly handle the heart ache that I am about to encounter... "Are you ready"? At times I feel like they are asking me to predict the future. The truth is I have a soft heart (something I have been told the world needs more of) and I know it is meant to be broken. However that is not what I am looking to. My answer is usually the excitement in thoughts of being able to love every little face I encounter. To be able to talk to that specific little one whom God put on my path or God put me on theirs to discover presence and His love encountered. And it is a very true hope. A hope that He can use me the best way He knows how.
There is something important that I have left out though.
You ask me how I feel. You ask me if I'm alright and if I will be able to handle these things in which are upon me. You may ask these things with a darker stand point on the subject. I would like to be a reminder that God's been there the entire time. We are headed there to amplify. We are headed there to celebrate and love. We are headed there to encourage and be encouraged.
Last night it hit me square in the face. What are my hopes? Amidst these worrisome nerves what are my ambitions for not only this journey but the road that I currently walk down with my own two feet?
I want to thrive not just survive.
Psalm 46:
1 God is our refuge and strength,
always ready to help in times of trouble.
2 So we will not fear when earthquakes come
and the mountains crumble into the sea.
3 Let the oceans roar and foam.
Let the mountains tremble as the waters surge!
Interlude
4 A river brings joy to the city of our God,
the sacred home of the Most High.
5 God dwells in that city; it cannot be destroyed.
From the very break of day, God will protect it.
6 The nations are in chaos,
and their kingdoms crumble!
God’s voice thunders,
and the earth melts!
7 The Lord of Heaven’s Armies is here among us;
the God of Israel is our fortress.
Interlude
8 Come, see the glorious works of the Lord:
See how he brings destruction upon the world.
9 He causes wars to end throughout the earth.
He breaks the bow and snaps the spear;
he burns the shields with fire.
10 “Be still, and know that I am God!
I will be honored by every nation.
I will be honored throughout the world.”
11 The Lord of Heaven’s Armies is here among us;
the God of Israel is our fortress.
Interlude
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