Stretching Matters

Firstly, Put this song on:
Hillsong United: Anchor

After spending miles on cruise control in the rental car I was blessed to be upgraded to, my Surroundings changed as trees got smaller and plains got wider. Wind more crisp and blue sky's expanding.

It is so hard for my heart and mind to grasp the realities that have happened in the last couple of weeks. As I sat in a moving vehicle for 11 hours to Salt Lake City I found myself taking decompressing breathes in while singing out continual praise of the direction He has me in.

I have learned over the last couple of years that Goodbyes suck. However the more I lean upon the Lords understanding, the more I realize that these goodbyes are more like, "see ya later". Each person impacts and timing is everything. His time, not mine.

Three weeks ago I was standing on the side of a road that became so familiar over the last 4 years. In the heart of the forest as I stood there doing what I've done most every Friday, waving goodbye to faces on Yellow school buses. Standing next to a wet sign in a wet rain jacket being who I have known for the last 4 years. And here I sit now in Pennsylvania, still me. Still a beloved daughter of God, trusting that He firmly has my hand leading me where he needs me... In Laramie, Wyoming

The last three weeks have been a whirlwind of sights, faces and places that have whizzed by and that have also slowly sunk deeper into my heart.

I drove 11 hours to Salt Lake City on Tuesday the 16th. and then continued on to Laramie Wyoming where I literally shook with excitement as the faces I had parted from 6 months earlier where back in front of mine.

My brother being crafty.

I put down a deposit on an apartment. Whoa. That made things more real than ever. After spending a few days in Denver running in an Ugly sweater race with friends and catching a red-eye to Pennsylvania on Sunday the 21st, I am finally home and enjoying most of my time just sitting and resting. Sitting and resting is something that I am really bad at most of the time so I figured now was the best time to practice. My brother came home for Christmas which was a thrill for my parents and brought back some hilarious moments reminding me how much my brother and I are alike in mannerisms.

Upon the turn of the New Year there are many things that I am completely unsure of. However, one thing that I am sure of is that God is good. All. The. Time. I know I've said it a lot lately but it's like listening to a really good song on repeat only I simply will never get sick of the song of His salvation and unconditional love!
I have been praying continually through this transition and I have been encouraged by so many via God speaking through and all around His creation and the people in it. Since being home though life has continued to move forward, I have been waiting to see how God will be placing the next steps down and what that will look like. Through His grace in working on my patience I have been rather anxious. In the midst of it I surrendered it all and reminded myself on a moment to moment basis that it is His will, not mine. No more bartering with Him. Simply hoping and speaking my desires so that they would align with His.

Upon arriving home to my room and flannel sheets I was unpacking my bags and I found a note from a dear friend:
"Daria,
You have exactly what you need to build God's Kingdom where you are."
"the faith, the hope, the trust, the joy... Everything else will follow."-Matthew 6:33

My dear friends, again, God is good. All the time. And He is FAITHFUL!

Let the Adventure Continue!

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Chapter Books

The rainy season is officially upon us here in the Redwood forest. It seems like each time we step outside the rain begins. Today however it wasn't rainy, it was a brisk blue sky day. As I sat in the parking lot yesterday waiting for school buses to arrive to pick up our students who explored the forest this week, I sat there and began reading psalms. 

"Let all that I am praise the Lord;

With my whole heart I will praise his holy name".-Psalm 103 NLT

Today marks the beginning of my 10 day count down until I depart towards Laramie, WY. Laradise.

My Father God has not been dawdling in teaching. His main subject this month is Patience. I have a tutor, His name is the Holy Spirit. 

While it has settled into me more and more that I will soon be departing and transitioning physically from this season in California I am really excited to be heading home to Pennsylvania for a couple of weeks to be home. The last time I was home in NEPA, I was stuck in a vortex waiting and wanting to get back to this coast. Now so many parts of my heart are looking forward to the rest and the joyful reunions of seeing faces and hearing words describe what God's been up. 

10 days and yet though there is no car in my clear sight that has been brought out of the wood work yet, I know my God is faithful and there will be an incredible story behind His timing and the falling into place of His desires for this journey, not mine. Just because I'm not given a car in my time preference doesn't mean it's not going to happen. I thought of this scenario as a failing in my eyes. Judgement of many but the truth is that God. Is. Faithful. His timing, not mine. 

I'll be departing Northern California to head North East in a car that I don't know yet. A car that God has chosen for me? Or a rental car? Either way God has been providing big things. Big things in the entire reason why I'm heading to Wyoming to begin with. To serve alongside many in the building and cultivating through SROM. I am extremely excited to announce that I am almost to my BEGINNING goal of $1,200 monthly supported! Nearly $60 monthly away currently! The Holy Spirit has been doing amazing things through perspective and teaching and discernment. The ideas and hopes that I put forward are often very different and there are times that I think that I'm beginning to catch on to fully giving it to God and then something happens that triggers my fingers to tighten back around these things surrendered.

 I entered into California, willingly to follow whatever path God had for me here and still does. And through it I am blessed beyond understanding and ability to describe. I'm honest when I say I am so glad that I said yes to Him. I am so thankful that I didn't try to LEAD upon MY own understanding but instead submitted to His will for my life for the amount of time that I have been out here. If I had peaced out when I thought I had wanted, there's no doubt that I wouldn't be headed where I'm prayerfully headed on December 16th. And for every single moment of suffering, sacrifice and dim light, I am grateful and praising the Holy Spirit for helping me to cling and rejoice in every single moment that is Northern California and those who surround it.

My bet is that All of this reality will set in somewhere in Nevada. Anyone have any other bets as to when this transition will feel real? As I speak there are boxes in my room and bits and peices of my life scattered all around this forest. I am excited to leave the things that Jesus wants me to leave here and take the lessons learned with me to be a vessel and a servant. I know I will miss it here. I am reminded of my steps upon the water when I first left PA to journey across to this majestic span of creation. I had no idea what was waiting for me at my destination but I felt joyful for the journey ahead and the peace of knowing Gods faithfulness.

"1 Give thanks to the Lord and 

proclaim his greatness.

 Let the whole world know what he has 

done.

2 Sing to Him; yes, sing his praises. 

Tell everyone about his wonderful deeds.

3 Exult in his holy name; 

rejoice, you who worship the Lord.

4 Search for the Lord and his strength;

 continually seek him. 

5 Remember the wonders he has performed, 

his miracles, and the rulings he has given, 

6 you children of his servant Abraham, 

you descendants of Jacob, his chosen

ones." Psalm 105:1-6  NLT

He is so faithful. To bend, break, mend and cultivate my time here along with others coinciding to make more progress on the tapestries of our souls.

-Keep Adventuring

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Unfolding

I was sitting on my flight back from Washington making a to do list of upcoming events and tasks for the next few weeks that are quickly dwindling and wrapping up my time in California. I was wishing I could be able to do all of these things right then and there and have it all be accomplished.

But then what?

Then what would I be preparing for? How would it make me any more present instead of day dreaming?

God has such purpose in His timing and I remind myself of that on a moment to moment basis.
His timing, not mine.
His will, not mine.
His Desires, not mine.
That last one is the hardest by far. Where do our desires come from and where in this walk does it not match up with His desires? At what moment do our desires even begin to look a different shade than His desires? How do we restore those colors and slate to walking and stepping in Gods time? We've never been in control of it all so why do we desire or think that we actually are?

Let's be honest, my own personal will power was completely intimidated and skeptical about this Washington trip, so much so that it almost didn't happen. So much of me questioned my own ability to "convince" people to come on board but that's a true, real good mindset/ heart to have because I literally can't do it. No one would be convinced if it was just me with the motive but see God has the motive. To use me as His vessel and use me to invite, encourage and call those He needs to be apart of it all. Apart of the architecture that is this area of the kingdom building.

Each of us are called specifically because He has made us with these things to be accomplished and fulfilled in mind. He created each of us with the intricate detail of His timing and will for each of us to accomplish these things for His good.

Past and Present

7 But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of knowing Christ. 8 What is more, I consider everything a loss  because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them Rubbish, that I may Gain Christ 9 and be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ- the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith. 10 I want to know Christ- yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, 11 and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead." Philippians 3: 7-11

Who are we when we sit in the midst of our own created comforts? How does it forcibly mess with our attempt to mess with Gods will for us? Why would we ever want to mess with Gods will for us? Better yet why would we ever settle for less?
I have realized and spoken of discomfort in my walk with the Lord. It is where God has called me. Within this continued discomfort I seek and find more comfort in Him and His plan for me rather than the low expectations I seek for myself. Clearly He has already led me to far higher expectations for myself than I ever would have imagined. Living a California dream in the Redwood forest at 28. This looks nothing like what I imagined 28 would be like... It's better.

3 I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you I always pray with joy 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."- Philippians 1:3-6 NIV

Just like the expectations I imagined for this trip to Washington were so small compared to what He actually did there. I had the opportunity to meet and visit with incredible people seeking direction and being content in where they are currently in Gods will for them., seeing the blessings unfold on the daily.

Support raising full time can be extremely intimidating or daunting. Typical Thought process seems selfish but that is a tactic that strays us away from reaching out into communities to further connect and allow God to use others as vessels to help to bless therefore seeing in all of this, continually, the only one that can be given credit, is God. Even in the struggle God does not leave our side for a moment. Instead, he intercedes to move the conversation forward such as my friend John did in Samammish, WA

While pouring out this last year of my life and the direction it all has brought me to point in, our conversation went quiet in between other topics of catching up. As I struggled with my timing, God prompted His timing and John asked me how he and his wife could support me. I'm pretty sure my jaw dropped slightly. "The Ask" was asked to me. God is so good in his perseverance and encouragement that He plants in each of us. Pointers in love from others constructive  criticism that continues this growth process and continual discovery of who God is unfolding from the debris that are our doubts, flaws and brokenness. Because of Gods will and His continued faithfulness in revealing His desires within others my "Stellar Support Team" has grown in joyful noise and size. Each and every family member on our team has something very specific to teach and learn. I am so excited to see where this next year takes all of us.

I can't thank you enough. I feel like I can't thank God enough for you as this journey continues.

"26 Brothers and Sister, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. 27 But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. 28 God chose the lowly things of this world and despised things- and the things that are not- to nullify the things that are, 29 so that no one may boast before him. 30 It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God- that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. 31 Therefore, as it is written:"Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord." -1 Corinthians 1:26-31

-Keep Adventuring

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Life Experience Needed.

Matthew 10:39- "If you cling to your life you will loose it; but if you give up your life to me, you will find it."

I am trying to experience this each minute in each word that I speak to those about the journey that God is bringing me on to fulfill what it is that He is trying to accomplish. I began to experience and see this as my years and opportunities have unfolded in California. People put in my life to share and dream with while his plans are fulfilled in and through each of us.

I am trying to understand the direction and weight of my reactionary process of how God's plans unfold for me. Lately I have lost my "go with the flow" and be joyful regardless. Instead everything is radically up or radically down. Either radically effected or radically unaffected. Big deals out of nothing and ignoring apparent favoritism. I've allowed distraction to get the best of me. And in that I am humbled, reminded and pushed back in the direction that is needed and so important because it leads to the fulfillment in Gods plans, not my own.

Today I look around and see students studying mundane things for high school classes. I can remember studying French at the library with Sam Pride in 8th grade and desperately trying to stay awake while listening to teachers teach seemingly irrelevant things. Doing homework and writing papers that I honestly can't even remember subjects and topics of.

I see the importance of education but why do I feel like the majority of it didn't even stick? As I'm sitting here writing I am thankful for the ability to read and write. Most of my teachers were passionate about impacting students and encouraging them. I'm sure I wouldn't be where I am without teachers who truly cared about my succeeding. Seeing the light inside of me and so many others in their time and devotion. It is something I have thought of a lot.

Things like life skills, love, belief, encouragement, raw reality and strength building through it are just a few things that come to mind when I think of my early education. No candy coating, but instead, tough love that grows us and made me better and thankful for the struggle and succeeding through that struggle. Although looking back, life seemed so much easier then. Things that we face today wouldn't even seem possible if we had not experienced those "impossible" things then.

We have no idea where we are being brought to through all of it. But how blessed is it to be fostered by the wise and courageous to learn and thrive to become better at who God wants us to be?

I don't want to go back to school anytime soon. In fact when I see students with their text books I am so thankful that I'm not in their shoes. But that doesn't mean that I don't want to keep learning. Everyday I question. Everyday we learn something new, everyday we discover and seek to understand something or someone more. How awesome is it to hold that passion to learn? I am continually encouraged by teachers past and present and I also apologize to English teachers. I wish more had stuck with proper punctuation...

But life is a learning experience.

Every Now and Then Realities

Today God has been pushing the point of a recent lesson hard today to make me understand that HE is the only one that can fully sustain.

"10 As the rain and the snow come from heaven,
and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." -Isaiah 55:10-11

While in this struggle there my eyes have widened, my pride shattered and my heart tamed again...and again...and again.

But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God's special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light." -1 Peter 2:9

It's funny how easily and carelessly something like a memory can be triggered by a current event. It's terrible and devastating if you allow it to effect you and the repercussions that you hold can make you feel as if you are right back where you originally were.

I have noticed that in this discovery I struggle to let it all go. My instinct has turned into holing it and ringing it until it's worn right through. Closing my heart and mind, burrowing, deeper into stone like mindset that everything and everyone is exactly alike. That the reason I protect these parts of myself are the same reasons why I did way back when because it's exactly the same...Exactly.

I know how wrong I am in this and the truth is that my human heart is so heavy. There are peaks during the day where I am simply too tired to bounce back, I'd rather burrow. What truth is in this? What even in the midst of this pain can I possibly see of that dim light that continually gets stronger the more I allow my hands to be pried from my eyes and light to flood in?

Confirmation.

He continues to confirm this direction that I must follow. While I struggle to believe that I know my heart better than he...

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."- Romans 8:28

I wont lie or deny the truth that I am tired of "bouncing back". So instead of doing just that I will simply lat at the foot of the cross and allow him to pick me up and carry me back or forward of whichever direction his will calls me toward. That direction continues to be nudging reminders of Wyoming. 

I stumbled across another blog today that resembled how I was trying to articulate the churning inside of me. (Listen to the song: Joy) Take a hot second and give it a gander. Let it soak in every now and then realities.

Relentless.

Tonight I can't shake a memory that I've had since college. One that sits in my heart reminding me of the hope of Jesus. Though I didn't know it at the time it was written to me, it has begun and will continue to fall into place with each day that God blesses me with.

It was shortly after I broke up with my boyfriend and headed out to finish the grueling task of my under grad. Moms are so encouraging. I have always been a fan of snail mail. I think that words written are far more impactful when seen that someone took time to sit down and focus completely on the note or letter. She was tender and understood my vulnerability. She had written something that still impacts my life and will for the rest of it. "I know it's hard right now, but know that things will turn out better than you could have ever imagined". Wise words from a wise Mamma.

How true it is That we really have no idea how much God sets us up for success if we would just allow Him to do the work in our lives to grow us and mold us to fit and pursue the things He needs us to accomplish His work. The things He has created each of us so individually to succeed.

"Why am I discouraged?

Why is my heart so sad?

I will put my hope in God!

I will Praise Him again-

my Savior and my God."- Psalm 42:11

Doing so changes our views and perspectives. Not just "can" but it actually WILL if we are persistent and continual in our obedience with doing so.

I have been doing 2 sets of push-ups 6 days a week. Monday- Saturday since January. I began with 2 sets of 5 legit push-ups. Every two weeks I up my stats... Then I hurt my shoulder in March so I took 2 or 3 weeks off. I was persistent. Doing them before bed, even when I don't want to do them, I do them. I bring myself to the ground and do them. Discipline began to form, I actually look forward to doing them. It is now September and I am up to doing 2 sets of 17. Legit.

Discipline reminds me of my friend Ashley. The first Summer I spent on the road in 2012 was my first exhausting summer on bike tour. Alarms would ring in the mornings while people snoozed and ignored them, dreading the beginning of the day. There were some sore exhausted mornings when we literally dreaded rising from our sleeping bags.

I would look over at Ashley's sleeping bag and she wouldn't be found there. Every time her alarm went off or if someone woke her up she would instantly spring and leap into the blessed morning. Even if her body was miserable, she would not hesitate. So I mimicked her. I have found that these little areas of discipline have proved incredible possibility in perspective and thriving. To praise God praise God even when you're filled with sorrow or exhaustion, praising God relentlessly. 

I want to praise God relentlessly.

I have learned through physical sacrifice, we gain more. We gain joy, we gain comfort and familiarity in our relationship with God. We build and practice faith and trust knowing that God provides love and watches over us relentlessly. We are human and in being human we are forgetful. The more that you practice something, whether it's a song on piano or Ukulele or even push-ups, if you are persistent you will see results. You will see things fill your brain, heart and body more than you might even realize. Through all of this, ultimately, God strengthens so through these circumstances and opportunities. Why dread it when you can leap in and embrace the moments that God gifts joyfully to us?

Why dread the morning sun of tomorrow when we are only promised today?

"at best, each of us is but a breath"

"You have made my life no longer than the width of my hand.

My entire life time is just a moment to you;

at best, each of us is but a breath." Psalm 39:5  

Keep adventuring.

Life Outside The Box

I am an active person. If you couldn't already tell, I really enjoy physical activity. If you have kept up with my blog over the last couple of years you will notice that in order for God to do some pretty insane works in my heart He has had to sit me down and make me still. Through injuries and displacement I have been shown crazy incredible things from bike saddles, hiking boots, couches and dreams.

While I have been suffering from Shingles unable to barely even bike 20 miles, I have been laying, sitting, reading and writing. I have begun the (what most would think terrifying) process of Support raising. Updating my contacts for news letters and setting up face to face appointments with people to talk more about the vision that is Solid Rock Outdoor ministries and why God has called me there.

I mentioned "terrifying" to some in regards that support raising can feel rather tedious and begger-ish. But the truth is that this is such an incredible opportunity and honestly a chance to connect and share this vision with so many more people. building a support team of believers in Christ and in love. Yes the ultimate purpose for this ministry is to equip students in discipleship opportunities while gaining a better understanding for their personal identity as a son or daughter in Christ. It is an opportunity to be apart of something bigger than us. A chance to continue to adventure together.

I am also excited because this provides me with a better schedule with more flexibility to consistently update my support team on the incredible things that God has been doing with in the ministry that He has called me to serve in. Instead of just doing a 2 month long ask or updating people on the next big adventure. Instead it is an ongoing adventure! 

ADVENTURE WITH ME!

I have had a thought on my heart that I was thinking about the other night. 

It is this: Money though it is an earthly need, it is not something that defines us. God defines us because He created us. We should not build walls and borders around who God is creating and growing us to be. In fact it probably causes Him pain to see the alterations and the shortcomings we build around ourselves mainly based off of money or social stats. The thought of who WE want to be versus who GOD wants us to be are two completely different people. Which person outcome do you think will be better? The one in which we struggle to create with our own strength and direction or the one that God has in mind and is capable of creating in us if we would just allow Him to?

We must stop building these walls around us that confine who we are compared to who God wants us to be. Money means nothing. God's bank is never depleted. However it is up to Him when and how finances are blessed among many. So my hope is that I am reminded of that daily. To know that in order to gain anything I must lay it all down and trust and ask continually for God to do His brilliant work in and around me to continue to build the kingdom.

If you feel like this speaks to you (even if it doesn't) check out my support page: 

Solid Rock Outdoor Ministries 

Keep Adventuring.